Dates accomplished: 22, 23, 24, 25 and 26. 74 to go!
I’m not going to lie, I love to kiss. It’s one of my favorite things to do. But I have a confession. I don’t really like to French kiss.
I’ll give you all a moment to gasp in shock and then compose yourselves.
Now let me explain, I do like a little bit of tongue, but just a little. More like a hint of tongue. What I really love are lips. Soft, sensual, long kisses, where the focus is on the lips. Yummy.
So why am I making this the subject of a blog post? Because I am shocked at the amount of bad kissers out there and I think it needs to be addressed.
I have told a few people about my taste in kissing, and most guys respond the same way, “well you just aren't kissing the right guys then!”. They then proceed to kiss me in exactly the way I DON’T like to be kissed. Fun for me.
Let me just say, I have kissed my fair share of guys, probably too many to be honest. And I know what I like and what I don’t. And when you slobber all over my face and jab your tongue down my throat like you’re trying to implant an alien into my stomach, it isn't exactly a turn on.
I did a blog post a while back about kissing, you can read it here if you want . It talks about all the different types of kissers I have encountered.
There used to be one of those horrible reality shows on VH1 (so of course I loved it) that taught really nerdy and shy guys how to gain confidence and pick up on women. Some of it was cheesy, but some of the tips were really good. They did a whole show on kissing, and it was some of the best advice I have ever heard.
I have a gift for you guys, hopefully the best piece of kissing advice you will receive;
*You should always wait at least 30 seconds during kissing before using any tongue*
Seriously. Please take this advice.
Why is everyone so quick to jam their tongue in someone’s mouth? At the very least, don’t come at me with your tongue already out! You laugh, but I can’t tell you how many times this has happened to me!
I have only kissed 2 guys since I started this dating challenge, neither of them were good. The most recent happened a few weeks ago.
We were chatting in his car (I don’t normally have first dates in a car, but the coffee shop we were at closed earlier than we expected). He was a nice guy, but he talked…a lot… I got bored, and figured the best way to shut him up was to kiss him, then I could go home. (And people wonder why I’m single??). He had gorgeous lips so I was hoping that maybe, just maybe this could be a good kiss. So he goes in for the kiss, and his tongue is already out of his mouth before he has even kissed me!!!
His tongue could just not figure out what to do, it was everywhere. I swear at one point he even licked my front teeth. Yes, really.
In my mind, I just couldn’t figure out how this hot, intelligent, sexy man, was now giving me quite possibly the worst kiss of my life. Have women told him this felt good? Were they encouraging this behavior??
And then the biting began.
I am all about a playful nibble on the lip, well into a good make out session (not 5 seconds in). But this was not a nibble.
This dude was biting my lip and I thought he was going to take it home with him.
At this point, I was looking for my escape plan.
I pulled back, he came forward, I pulled back further, he was still here. At this point, I was practically pushed against the window. OK, time for the kiss and release, get my lip back unharmed and head home.
Mission accomplished. My lip survived for future adventures.
*I think it’s important to clarify here, at no time did I ever feel threatened or in danger. He was a sweet guy who just didn't have a lot of experience. Or had a lot of experience from some really bad teachers*
So what makes a good kisser in my opinion?
Confidence is a big one.
Be romantic, but passionate.
Limit the tongue, it should be a tease, not a tidal wave.
Put your hands on my face, not in a creepy way.
Nibble my lip, but only if you know for sure it’s something I like.
If my eyebrow, cheek or forehead are wet after kissing you, you’re doing it wrong.
Some of you may be thinking “If you have kissed that many guys, and most of them are bad, maybe you’re the bad kisser?”. I have definitely considered this option.
I choose to think that the problem isn't me, I could be wrong :)
If all else fails, follow this simple advice.
Happy kissing everyone!!